Bad Relationship – Can We Avoid It or Is It a Destiny?

young couple yelling at each other

Recently I read an article about how some people continuously attract or better said cultivate relationships that are obviously not good for them. And these bad relationships don’t refer only to intimate love partners but also to your friends, colleges, relatives.

If I think of bad things will bad things really happen?!

So this article was sharing the Law of attraction point of view briefly meaning that if someone meets and associates with the same kind of bad personalities all the time, over again, then the cause for this lies in the Law of attraction. Simply said, this person attracts bad company and has bad relationship because he/she thinks of the characteristics of such bad relationship.

So this article was sharing the Law of attraction point of view briefly meaning that if someone meets and associates with the same kind of bad personalities all the time, over again, then the cause for this lies in the Law of attraction. Simply said, this person attracts bad company and has bad relationship because he/she thinks of the characteristics of such bad relationship.
For example, if one thinks that he/she will be cheated by her/his partner that, according to the Law of attraction, will probably happen. Or if you are completely focused on the bad personal qualities of your college and want to change your department you’ll probably go to meet another person with such qualities.

bad relationship
Knowing that the Law of attraction considers our belief system and the focus of our mind and energy it seems that people who continuously have bad relationships seem to lack the capacity of self-awareness (as introspection) and self-control. It may seem they are submitted.
But don’t worry; there is a cure, as Law of attraction coaches suggest: figure out what do you believe in and which concrete beliefs are the basis of your ability to attract what you don’t want. Write down all the possible reasons that are behind attracting this unpleasantness.
The idea is to find out and eliminate what is limiting you and making you project the negative thoughts and feeling that eventually will bring you something you don’t want at all. One of the first steps can be to stop talking about these beliefs and thoughts stop sharing that energy in your circle and try to replace them with new points of view.
So, I think this can be good and very helpful drill that can be done for almost everything we face as a negative aspect of our life. What usually is recognized as limiting refers to a certain philosophical misconception, prejudices, stereotypes, traumas in our childhood or self- impressions such as “I don’t deserve to be loved”, “nobody loves me” or “all humans are evil” etc.

Good morning how is your karma today?

But are we really attracting these types of persons in our life or there is some other catch here? For example, I know people (including myself) that have completely changed, their habits, opinions, behavior, reconfigured their thoughts, thinking positive, but yet, still some destructive patterns remain. Some bad relationships are still here. Guy/lady comes in their life, they fall in love but something happens and they are abandoned again. Even, worse scenario that I have seen in my life, some lady being physically abused by every new guy she meets.
I searched for some answers in different understanding of our human life. Determination (philosophically speaking) or what we refer to as destiny or karma. These two categories are not the same but strongly related. While destiny as a term is present in the antique philosophy (stoics for example) and in Christianity, karma is part of the many spiritual traditions from India (including Buddhism) and is referred to as the law of cause and effect.
What is in common of these two divine laws, I would call them, is the question of the free will. Is our this article’s context that would mean Do I really have a choice regarding who is to be my love partner, husband or wife, a friend etc?”. I will not go into explanation but just want to point out on a different and probably opposite point of view on the problem of bad relationships.
You see, if there is destiny or karma that means that whoever we meet in our life is not there by chance/accident. He/she can be given by God so we can overcome a certain obstacle and become a better person. Or these people are here in our life because there are reasons for that from our previous lives – maybe we have some “debts to pay” because we mistreated them or have hurt them in our previous lives.
My point is if there are certain events that are combined with very strong and intense emotions. Yes, The Law of Attraction sounds very attractive, because it gives you this feeling that everything is possible and that you are the owner of your destiny. Everything can be changed.
This idea of us being masters of our faith doesn’t oppose to Christian faith or karma related traditions. They both acknowledge the existing of free will and raise the question of how we use it. What they also agree is that certain event in our life just had to happen. And we all have experience of that how some things in our lives happened no matter how hard we tried, we simply could not avoid them.


My conclusion would not be an attempt to reconcile these two different views – the law of attraction and determinism. I have experience of being attracted by specific kind of girls as teen and young adult because of my opinion of what’s good or bad at that time. What suits me and pleases me and what is repulsive to me. As I grow up and got matured I have changed my value system and way of judging people, so my goals were changed and taste for life too. So I agree that when I changed and abandoned certain negative habits and ways of thinking about life, naturally i abandoned bad relationships and started to meet new positive kinds of people in my life.
Psychology emphasizes the importance of being aware and even having control over our thoughts. Our mind (thoughts) are the area where we should be kings, we should rule that realm. But we see that is not easy at all while we are bombed by external influences. People spend tens of years in trying to control their mind (yogis for example).
Also, we cannot ignore today science that proofs that we are preconditioned (as some determination philosophical schools claim). We are preconditioned by our genetic material. We can even choose what kind of abilities our future child will have or avoid the bad ones.
By these analogies, I want to say that sometimes you can get off the train easily or with some effort, but sometimes when is too dangerous to cut off, you just have to wait and see what is about to happen and most important learn the lesson.
I don’t know, does it makes sense or is it too much?

30 Replies to “Bad Relationship – Can We Avoid It or Is It a Destiny?”

  1. And here is another amazing post.

    Love this.

  2. Wonderful food for thought. I always think of it as a decision. Every morning I decide I’m going to think the best about my husband .. no matter what happens. So far so good .. we have a really great marriage

  3. Great piece. Positivity is the key to relationship, and just life in general.

  4. I find this a really interesting conversation. I believe positivity, hope and kindness helps!

  5. Thank You for sharing the Post! Nice read. 🙂

  6. Very on point! Keep it up 🙂 xx

  7. I’m lucky enough to have not had a bad relationship, but found this to be a very interesting read.

  8. I admit this sounds like a strange idea, but a bad relationship can be a useful, powerfully knowledgeable experience. We can sit down and feel bad about how its going, living in a world so saturated in misery and loss of what could have been, or we can take it as a learning experience, see what has happened, be proud of the good parts (however minimal they may have been) and move forward with this new power and hopefully should another relationship come round, the results would be different, be that based on the sort of person you end up in a relationship with, or based on your understanding of a relationship. Like the idea that they are a journey that ends too soon though its a good premise.

  9. Bad relationships are never the destiny that journey ends soon. Very well explained!!

  10. I feel like people think relationships just mean romantic, when every connection that you make with someone is technically a relationship. The law of attraction is extremely true though. I worked at a place that had great energy, until it didn’t, and I just dreaded going into work. Attitudes really do change how people act.

  11. Interesting point to make and I do feel that karma is very much a big thing . When you start looking for faults with a partner things fall apart and nine times out of 10 like you said manifest into destiny x

  12. Lovely piece…..there will be frictions but respect will let you manage it well

  13. Wow! Such a great post! Well written!

  14. Rational quotient and emotional quotient are two separate things..Life is much simpler if there is a fine balance between the two…

  15. I don’t about destiny truth is I value time more than anything, I just want these bad relationships taking so much of my time and in the end just ending with nothing.

  16. Greatly expressed.
    Loved reading.

  17. I have come to believe in the 50/50 chance in life.

  18. Wow, truly amazing post! We all need to reconsider if relationships that we are in, are good or bad for us. Sometimes we are in a bad realtionship, but we don’t realize it. Thanks for sharing! 🙂

  19. Like your approach. Nicely written.

  20. Even if unavoidable, I’d never accept bad relationships as a fact of life!

  21. Very well written! i am saving it so that i can read it again in tough times. Thank you

  22. This is a very nice piece of post.Wow,i like the way you went about the whole post.

  23. Yes – I think our relationship are a result of everything… experience and chance… it’s up to us only to decide what is good and what is bad and maybe have the strength to let go if we need to…

  24. I love this already……….

  25. We can not completely avoid rather we might to learn some preventing tips.So we may make our relationship comfortable and rational…thx.

  26. Thanks for the great post and for sharing all this really interesting information. Love your Blog

  27. nicely put! i love your approach.. Negativity attracts nothing but its like. <3

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